Newly arrived in New York

blog 2:

day four.

i can't believe it's day four already and i still feel that i haven't woken up properly yet. i seem to be wandering around in a daze, not quite believing that i'm here. the emotional machinations of moving to another country are too tedious to go into, so i'll spare you that. suffice to say that it feels surreal.

sunday. today my good friend jen and her new hubby josh arrived over to my apartment first thing this morning (after i woke from an enviable dream about brian o'driscoll - ok, i won't bore you..) and we walked a block to the waters edge from where there are spectacular views of lower manhattan. the whole area looks like the set out of 'gangs of new york'; all disused industrial buildings, barren landscape, old empty streets and cobbled roads. most of the buildings are pre-war and the only signs of 'life' were old renovated 3-storey brownstone houses, a café and the odd artists' studio (complete with cobblers' paraphernalia and live kitten in the shop front window) and random items littering the 'side-walk'; a foot-high virgin mary statue among weeds, a large breeze block with a printer perched on it and near a metal-processing factory, rusted metal life-sized horses mascarading as pieces of art. apparently in brooklyn, the more disparate the items are to each other, the more credible your association to 'cool'. i remember a bar in williamsburg a few years ago with neon fairy lights decorating the inside of the shop-front window, along with the torso and head of a plastic baby doll perched upright, wearing a ra-ra skirt and a WWII tin hat. working out what that was trying to say is missing the point, i presume. we walked about a mile to a super-size-me sized supermarket that was like a good food deli of mammoth proportions. the food on offer is just incredible. this has to be one of the reasons many people come here. inside this 4,000 square ft ground floor shop there was a fish market, many deli counters selling salads of all kinds, towers of round blocks of parmesan cheeses the size of car tyres gently sweating in the heat and no end of vegetables and fruit stacked almost vertically in boxes with the open side face front. a box of kiwis had one kiwi missing from near the bottom, taken no doubt to test the jenga effects of the stack. how there aren't more cartoon moments of spilled fruit mushed under trolley wheels, i don't know. fresh thai soup, crabmeat chowder, sea vegetables, sushi, noodle salad, fresh organic undiluted melon juice, you name it.. new york has it. in spades. outside the supermarket there was a cafe overlooking the water and josh, as a city planner, pointed out the old routes for barges and boats coming in and out of the lower three boroughs. the statue of liberty stood in plain view and i promised myself i'd go to staten island soon for a day and walk around the museums and see the horror of how the irish got here in days past. there was also a water taxi that will take you to manhattan for $6, should the notion take you. and all day the sun shone like it was june. after we dropped off the groceries jen and i took the subway to broadway to some 'sample sale' where, i kid you not, gorgeous designer clothes were being sold on the final day of the sale for $5 a piece. we looked like we'd mugged some old ladies from a launderette when we were done. later we met old college friends of jen and josh's for burritos in park slope, brooklyn, where the guacamole man prepared two large fresh bowls of the stuff beside our table from scratch in a large herb grinder.. avacados, green chili, onion, tomato.. one bowl quite hot, the other inedible, and presented them to us with five dried banana slices in each for scooping it onto plates to eat with tortilla chips. clean, fresh food. can't beat it.

mind you, not everything is as clear as it might be; the beer that i bought on the way back home lists the calories, carbohydrates, protein and grams of fat on the can, but no alcohol content. (i presume if it was alcohol-free it would've said.) drinkers of coors light seemingly appear more concerned with their body fat index than with their alcoholism.

for those interested in padraig's welfare, he's settling in great. he doesn't lie around, he luxuriates himself on the dark hard wood floors looking pleased with himself, and every night he has his mad half hour where he flails himself off furniture and runs around like a mad thing, leaping in the air at imaginary flies. then he'll stop dead in his tracks, check left and right and then dart off, looking like he's acting in a bourne identity sequel. he seems to have taken to new york living quite well. and the flat is big enough for him to get lost for hours on end, enjoying, as he does, me wandering around calling his name and having to crawl under furniture to find him. his litter tray is like a small house and i think i've finally cracked why he was reluctant to use such an inferior model back home. four days in and, so far, no little presents hanging around behind the front door, ready to spread their glory when you come in at night. padraig, for the record, is not my "beau" - thanks kieron - but my year old persian cat. he's too cute. pics of him on facebook.

last night sean o'driscoll came over and we drank beer and played old frames albums and felt like students again. he's doing great; career going well, the new owner of an apartment in park slope (15 mins away), great girlfriend.. all good. but i played him the michael marrinan cd (sean's from clare) and he spoke reminiscently of dublin, with all the pangs of a long-term emigrant. but the truth is dublin has changed from being the creative hub it was 10 years ago. the property boom and the subsequent plateau, the ambition for wealth, the expansion of businesses and the current mild economic uneasiness have all left dublin in a loop that's going to take some time before it comes round to being dynamic again. dublin is a fantastic city, no doubt about it, but for now, it seems small to me and there are benefits to going away in what i see as its current creative lull. don't get me wrong, if i'd had the tenacity to face down the al qaeda fear in post-9/11 i would've moved here in october 2001 like i'd planned, but growing up in a war zone (belfast) makes that environment passé. i'm glad i didn't then, and i'm glad i did now.

from where i'm sitting, i can see the lower manhattan skyline in full view (sans twin towers). this flat really is amazing. seriously, anyone wanting to visit - i recommend you arrive in november if you can. although, that's not to deter those who've said that they'll come over for new year.. but this apartment, not only has it got two main sources of light back and front of the building (rare for new york), but the sofa turns into a double bed with a proper mattress and the roof views are lovely. just letting you know. and God knows where i'll be in january.

the light in the morning in my room is the kind of light you'd expect in the tropics; glaring and hot. i took the curtains off the windows to maximise the effect. waking up in the morning, two large windows throw in a glare of deep blue sky, the kind of which you'd see in australia or africa, and it does your heart good. you know you're far from home, but here's the irony; though it's hot and balmy and the environment is very different, it actually feels like home. i felt it when i first arrived, but i put it down to suppressed excitement (when i took the cab from JFK, it felt like i'd been on holidays and had just arrived home). in the intervening days i've not ventured out much, maybe fearing that the thrill of being here might be overwhelming (i was overwhelmed getting everything organised in the last few weeks and that was an endurance test that i'm recovering from), but instead felt content to sit at home, cleaning and tidying, making the place my own, or 'nesting' as mum would put it.

i'm reading 'brendan behan's new york' at the moment and the man has a take on city living that is priceless ("A city is a place where you are least likely to get a bite from a wild sheep"), but he also says: "New York is easily recognizable as the greatest city in the world, view it any way and every way - back, belly and sides. ...We don't come to a city to be alone, and the test of a city is the ease with which you can see and talk to other people...and I'd say that New York is the friendliest city I know. I knew an old Irishman who went there when he was 75 and ill, and like a Lourdes of light, New York cured him and he lived happily for years afterwards, a healthy and happy old man. He painted my wife's grandmother and his name was Jack Yeats, the father of William Butleter Yeats, the great poet of Ireland and the world" (sic).

i hope you're all well and don't take these missives as anything other than an update on what's going on.. they're no replacement for personal emails and i hope to stay in touch properly. as before, don't feel obliged to read these, or read them to the end.. life's short. starting work on tuesday, so i'll be busy with that for the next few days, and a 'welcome to the states' party happening on friday, apparently.. i'll be in touch at some stage.

much love,
suzanne
xxx

Newly arrived in New York

hallo all,

well i finally got round to finding out what a blog is, and this is it (apparently). i'll post these up as well as emails, to accommodate technophobes like me. if you don't want to be included in those emails, let me know..

blog 1:

well, so far new york has been a blur of jet-lagged greyness and sleepy restlessness. the flight was great, fluffy mr P slept thru most of it and only once made a bid for freedom - at the x-ray bit of security, when i had to take him out to have the cat-box x-rayed. he saw all the people and he tried to leg it. the security guy thought this was hilarious and was pawing him making 'aww' sounds while padraig was drawing blood over my shoulder and i was looking at the x-ray machine, then to the cat-box sitting beside it, to the security guy pawing padraig and making him even more freaked. a flat 'any time you like' and yer man got on with his job. all the stress and hassle of getting him to the vet weeks ago, to get him micro-chipped and get the vet to write a wee letter saying that he wasn't infected with disease, which was apparently absolutely essential, was of no consequence going thru customs. it seems that you can carry anything at all in with you so long as you carry it in a bag that hangs at hip-height.. thereby screening it from the guy in the booth, whose job it is to protect the nation from disease-wielding terrorists. great.

i'm sitting here at home writing this, in this lovely apartment. i doubt i'll actually be able to afford such a great place when i move on in december (note to all those coming over: this is a great gaff. you'll be very comfortable staying here. no such promises after december 15). it's a one-bed with a study, a huge bedroom and big and bright living room; exposed brick, wooden floors throughout, blah. massive couch that turns into a more comfortable double bed than most you've ever slept in. spent the most of the day (after waking up at 5am, not being able to lie there, contemplating going to south ferry municipal buildings near wall st just to enjoy the spectacle of the tai chi enthusiasts doing their thing as the sun comes up and and getting up to unpack and pottering about, ringing home and ringing rory - the chile - in sydney for an hour) shopping in downtown brooklyn. this is the downtown brooklyn black district that stayed in the 70s. geezers in dodgy leather jackets and sean coombs sunglasses, shops with tatty signs selling cheap gik and mega-amounts of *bling*, overweight ladies in cup-cake jeans and cheap shoes, shops selling underwear and computer keyboards. it reminded me of birmingham (uk), except it was missing the pall of depression and the pissy weather. so, headed off to get the essentials; buy a 'cell' phone (hilarious episode with a black ali g character in the shop my side of the counter, who turned out to be a bona fide T-mobile dealer assisting the woman doing the sales on t'other side of the counter, obviously doing that job as a supplement income for his other more varied pursuits), food (too much to say about that), booze and cat food. got all the basics and walked back. it was a beautiful walk .. had a brief encounter with a squirrel who was collecting nuts around the base of a tree on the street. he saw me, paused, i paused, he ran. i got some nuts, walked over and looked up thru the branches and caught sight of him. he stared down at me and we had a brief nature-nurture moment. it was lovely. i threw the nuts down on the ground for him and got looked at by a nature-deficit passer-by. and the sun came out. it had been misty this morning when i climbed the steps to the roof at 5am. the dawn was in its initial stages and the skyline's contrast was blurred but you could make out the sweep of the river. it was great. but coming home today, the rain was gone and the sun was beaming, keeping the dry winter air in the shadows. but by the time i was heading back, i got the distinct feeling of being strung out on that too much daylight, not enough sleep vibe; the result of flying after not sleeping enough after being boozed up on a five-day bender. staying in tonight.

on the up side, i've been sitting here listening to a cd given to me by "the legendary finbar boyle" (official title - the phoenix), by a man called michael marrinan, who sings a ballad about new york that became a mainstay for the last few months.. after i'd decided to move over here last july, i got a tad obsessive about getting back here and getting all the factors into play to make it happen. during this time finbar gave me a copy of marrinan's cd and while it's old school irish ballad sentiment and sound, it cuts to the core like only that can. great stuff. if you're inclined, you'll get it in claddagh records. totally worth it for track 2 alone. imagine a co clare ballad with a lamenting air singing about the big apple, if you can.. i quote:

oh i love to be lodged in the place where you can't go astray
oh i love to be found in the streets that run straight
oh i love new york, to walk in the crowds all alone
i'm homesick for new york
i hate leaving new york
homesick for new york
though new york it was never my home.

it was a bit of a mantra for me these last few months, just to get me thru the enduring hell of trying to organise everything in order to end my life there and to get me here. if it got me thru, i thank you finbar. and hearing it new in new york, it sort of fits as a bridge, a song that belongs in the process, not in the arriving. i thank you anyway finbar, cos it's a truly beautiful song.

speaking of verses that are playing a hand in this, so far mostly-solo experience, i got an email from an ex-work colleague today, quoting some poet speaking of precipices (maybe that was my word, not his) between the past and the future and all you can see is the present. all great stuff.

"The Sun-Dial at Wells College" (New York State)

The shadow by my finger cast
Divides the future from the past:
Before it, sleeps the unborn hour,
In darkness, and beyond thy power:
Behind its unreturning line,
The vanished hour, no longer thine:
One hour alone is in thy hands,
The now on which the shadow stands.

~ Henry Van Dyke 1911

having a wee mark geary moment now (second album), but earlier 'love and theft' (recent vintage dylan) was getting an airing. and the very excellent 'elbow' album, 'the leaders of the free world (are all just little boys throwing stones)' has been a constant for the last last few weeks - thank you dave and alison!!! - hey ali, how's the house?? - good memories and fantastic album (i've been handing copies out to people - go buy it if you haven't got it; a classic). all this, nothing to the impending arrival after rory (brother) sent me a link for the new radiohead album - free if you want it to be free on the web right now. those who want to pay for it online, can. the ethos of capitalism is taking a right thrashing as a result. all good. but the record company still wants to keep the band on and release their album in january for the regular fee. 1.2 million copies "sold" already. apparently it's their best for 10 years. i'll send round a link to anyone who wants it.

there were pictures taken on the final night of the mini-marathon bender that i'll post up on facebook. the stags head. shame on you who didn't make it; david keane, you're first in the spotlight. great night. the usual irish experience of introducing gangs of people to each other, where they either already know each other or where the odd party-member got a prompt to launch into lengthy conversations with a complete stranger that lead to them both heading off into the night not to be seen for several hours. una, next up. great to see you joe; spoke to the chile earlier, great form. he can't wait to move here.

anyway. this has probably gone on long enough. dave, if you get this; in the hell of the last evening, you kindly packed my laptop and didn't pack my laptop lead.. it'll be still hanging around the back of the tv.. went to buy another one today and got stung for $50- from some guy with a successful selling technique and a jewish air. to be fair to him, although i was bartering him down with the inescapably solid line that i had another one at home that i could get posted out for mere pence, the thing was originally $80 and $120 in some other high street store. the pain and effort of not having internet was too much to bear and he won out. welcome to new york, i thought.

better go.

hope you're all well. and sorry to those of you who didn't get text messages from me after i landed here... my irish mobile phone is stubborn at the best of times, but it point blank refused to send any messages from here to anyone at all. fucker. once i get all my details from its memory banks it's being put out on the roof at dawn in a blindfold and being shot off the balcony. video to follow on youtube. piece of crap. new number in new york is available thru email. usual gmail account best to get me on. more thrilling episodes to follow, no doubt. if you can't bear to endure them (answers on a postcard), don't be shy. life has to be more enthralling somewhere else.. taking these in large doses can't be easy.

thinking of you all and hoping this gets to you all ok.

stay in touch,
love suzanne
xxxxxx